The first Wicked press tour was thrillifying.
We will never again experience anything on the scale of the “holding space for the lyrics of ‘Defying Gravity,’” video for the first time again, nor can we regain the first-time feeling of hearing Ariana Grande talk about how confusifying the incident was.
There were many good moments from this year’s press tour for Wicked: For Good, the second installment of the franchise (and final installment—I don’t care what Michelle Yeoh said on the red carpet…don’t ruin a good thing with too many sequels. LEARN from Jurassic Park). Even if, for the most part, the cast was, as the kids say, “reheating their nachos” from their first time over the rainbow, there was plenty to cherish about the delightful, sometimes scandalacious press tour.
In order of my personal preference for the cultural importance of each moment, from maybe forgettable to forever meme, here we go:
Jeff Goldblum’s Giant Head
The Wicked: One Wonderful Night concert was more iconic than we give it credit for. Cynthia flew, there was a cute kid, Bowen Yang and Ethan Slater pretended to be Jonathan Bailey. One moment that stood out was when they asked the cast if they took anything home from the set, a common interview question at the end of a run, and everyone had normal answers until Jeff Goldblum said he took home his giant stone head. The bit got better when they rolled tape showing Goldblum carting the thing all over his house.
So, side story: My dad confused my love of Jurassic Park and the Meisner Acting Technique with a specific love of Jeff Goldblum and gives me Goldblum gifts for every holiday. I mean, I like Jeff but not as much as my dad thinks I do. DAD: IF YOU ARE READING THIS, I DO NOT WANT A GIANT GOLDBLUM HEAD. I already have a pillow with his face on it and people find it upsetting.
Lie Detecting
In our first major reheated nacho moment, we bring our stars back to the lie detector test, which I never get sick of. Last time, Cynthia and Ariana got in the weeds a bit when it seemed that Ms. Grande didn’t believe in the moon landing. This round, Ariana was joined by bestie (in the movie and IRL) Bowen Yang, who teased her about her relationship with the moon.
More amusing was when Bowen was in the hot seat and Ariana got to grill him about their tongue-filled kiss on SNL. Ariana brings out her “I’m about to cry” face and asks Bowen, so earnestly, “Am I a good kisser?” When Bowen says yes, the lie detector judges it as “Inconclusive,” and Bowen says, “But I’m gay.” Ariana accepts this as a plausible explanation for why he didn’t love making out with her and says, “Pardon me, gay.” The true test of this theory is if they join again in tonsil hockey when Ariana hosts SNL December 20th.
Happy Days
It takes a strong set of performers to take on Babs and Judy. Cynthia and Ariana closed out Wicked: One Wonderful Night with an homage to the two icons in which they recreated the legendary number from a 1963 episode of The Judy Garland Show, “Happy Days Are Here Again/Get Happy.” Emulating the two original performers by sitting on stools, with Cynthia as Barbra Streisand and Ariana as Judy Garland, they sang their lungs off and, while we can never say they were better than their foremothers, they provided a beautiful tribute and opened the door for the younger generation to revisit the original performance and learn a bit about music history.
Witch Song (Reprise)
Last round, an annoyingly catchy song on The Tonight Show With Jimmy Fallon earned Jimmy his most viral hit yet. “I’m a witch.” “No I’m a witch.” “So which is which?” “Well here’s the sitch.” Okay it’s pretty good. This time, they brought in their friends and castmates Jonathan Bailey, Michelle Yeoh, Ethan Slater, Marissa Bode, Bowen Yang, and Jeff Goldblum.
It was catchy. It was cute. It was colorful. It was derivative. I don’t care. I loved it.
Such Braverism
When someone who doesn’t deserve to be called a fan stormed the yellow carpet and got in Ariana’s bubble, the actual bodyguards on the scene were slow to respond, but Cynthia F-ing Erivo put her body in between the attacker and Ariana, which alerted security to get on it. The video is kinda scary, but the still of Cynthia staring down the bad guy is bada--. The way she and Michelle Crouching Tiger Yeoh comforted and encircled Ariana was inspiring. They’re my superheroes.
Also, because this incident blew up—likely owed to Cynthia’s fast action—the dude, who has done this kind of thing several times before, actually has to serve some time (only nine days, but now everyone knows his face and it sets a precedent that doing this kind of thing is actually a crime, duh).
“In solidarity”
Cynthia lost her voice, which I can believe, given all the chit chat these gals are expected to do as part of this experience, and announced that she couldn’t give interviews at the film’s NYC premiere. Then, popular social media account Pop Crave reported, “Ariana will also be skipping interviews, in solidarity.”
The internet had fun with this one in the comments, with people saying things like, “I will also not be giving interviews in solidarity” or “I will be staying home from work tomorrow in solidarity.” I mean, good on ya. Live together, die alone, you know?
The Sexiest Man Alive
Congratulotions to The Daily Beast’s Obsessed editor Kevin Fallon for bagging the Sexiest Man Alive, Jonathan Bailey.
Okay, we kid, but having Jonathan Bailey as Sexiest Man Alive this year is pretty awesome, not only because he’s deserving, but because he’s the first openly gay man to earn the title. In a hellscape like the one we’re doomscrolling in, any step in the direction of inclusivity is welcome, and it couldn’t have happened to a more delightful guy. Bailey has been warm and humble with fans and interviewers through this whole, exhausting ordeal, and seeing him get his flowers is simply wonderful.
Sexist Man on Sesame Street
Bailey took a trip to Sesame Street to hold space with Elmo. Elmo was voted Cutest Monster Alive and posed on his cover with his dog, just like Bailey did with his dog, Benson. While my kids are far out of the Elmo-phase, I forced my son to watch the mindfulness clip this morning when he was raging at his video game, and while he told me I was lame, that Elmo was for babies, and that he doesn’t even like Wicked (he does), he chilled out watching the bit.
Even better was when gay icons Bert and Ernie danced through life with Bailey in another clip. Rejoicify.
You deserve each other, this hat and you
My favorite saga of the tour involved Cynthia’s hat. Gather round for a story:
At the London premiere of Wicked, Cynthia Erivo lost her hat, which looked like an all-black version of the hats the munchkins wear in the original Wizard of Oz, or possibly something that would be worn by a goth Who. This year, Cynthia was approached by a fan, Clara, on the street in Paris, who informed the superstar that she had the missing hat. The reaction gif that came from this revelation is my second-favorite Cynthia gif, after the one of her tappy-tapping her head.
OK, end of story, right? No. The delightful denouement of this adventure is Pop Crave posting, “Cynthia Erivo has reunited with her lost hat,” with just the cutest pics of the duo (hat and star) enjoying each other’s company yet again. Clara was able to get Cynthia the hat back at the London premiere (which she got a ticket to because of her find).
Let me say it again ON THE RECORD: We do not need Wicked 3: Electric Boogaloo. This was the final curtain for the Oz crew. Cherish these memeable moments, hold them close, and hope that when bad guys descend, Cynthia (and her hat) are nearby.
